I also feel that that foundation is not enough. After several miserable significant person essay ventures which had left my skin red and my hook bare, I felt certain that, at last, my day had arrived, significant person essay. Trending Here are the facts and trivia that people are buzzing about. December Current Events: US News. In fact, so completely absorbed was I in my thoughts that the lengthy journey to our favorite fishing spot seemed fleeting. While I treasure the various worlds my mother has opened to me abroad, my life has been equally transformed by what she has shown me just two miles from my house.
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Essay 1: Princeton Essay 2: Harvard Essay 3: Princeton Essay 4: Brown. Note: The following essays were not edited by EssayEdge Editors, significant person essay. They appear as they were initially reviewed by admissions officers. I have learned a great many things from participating in varsity football. It has changed my entire outlook on and attitude toward life. Before my freshman year at [high-school], I was shy, significant person essay, had low self-esteem and turned away from seemingly impossible challenges. Football has altered all of these qualities. On the first day of freshman practice, the team warmed up with a game of touch football. The players were split up and the game began. However, during the game, I noticed that I didn't run as hard as I could, nor did I try to evade my defender and get open, significant person essay.
The fact of the matter is that I really did not want to be thrown the ball. Significant person essay didn't want to be the one at fault if I dropped the ball and the play didn't succeed, significant person essay. I did not want the responsibility of helping significant person essay team because I was too afraid of making a mistake. That aspect of my character led the first years of my high school life. I refrained from asking questions in class, afraid they might be considered too stupid or dumb by my classmates. All the while, I went to practice and everyday, I went home physically and mentally exhausted.
Yet my apprehension prevailed as I continued to fear getting put in the game in case another player was injured. I was still afraid of making mistakes and getting blamed by screaming coaches and angry teammates. Sometimes these fears came true, significant person essay. During my sophomore season, my position at backup guard led me to play in the varsity games on many occasions. On such occasions, I often made mistakes, significant person essay. Most of the time the mistakes were not significant; they rarely changed the outcome of a play. Yet I received a thorough verbal lashing at practice for the mistakes I had made. These occurrences only compounded my fears of playing, significant person essay.
However, I did not always make mistakes. Sometimes I made great plays, for which I was congratulated. Now, as I dawn on my senior year of football and am faced with two starting positions, significant person essay, I feel like a changed person, significant person essay. Over the years, playing football has taught me what it takes to succeed. From months of tough practices, I have gained a hard work ethic. From my coaches and fellow teammates, I have learned to work well with others in a group, as it is necessary to cooperate with teammates on the playing field. Significant person essay most important, significant person essay, I significant person essay also gained self-confidence.
If I fail, significant person essay, it doesn't matter if they mock or ridicule me; I'll just try again and do it better. I realize that it is necessary to risk failure in order to gain success. The coaches have always said before games that nothing is impossible; I know that now. Now, significant person essay, I welcome the challenge. Whether I succeed or fail is irrelevant; it is only important that I have tried and tested myself. The topic significant person essay this essay is how the applicant has matured and changed since his freshman year. He focuses on football. One of the strengths of this essay is that it is well organized.
The applicant clearly put time into the structure and planning of this essay. He uses the platform of football to discuss and demonstrate his personal growth and development through the high school years. What he could have done better was spend more time describing himself after he made improvements, significant person essay. As it is, he only tells us about his newfound confidence and drive. This essay would have been stronger had he actually shown us, perhaps significant person essay including a story or describing an event where his confidence made a difference. Her face contorted into a grimace of disgust as she and her friend continued to complain that Americans had no culture, that they never learned another language, and that their inferior customs were spreading throughout Europe like an infectious disease.
Each hair on the back of my neck sprang to attention, as I strained to hear the women's inflammatory remarks. I gripped my bag of McDonald's harder with each insulting phrase. I had been living in Geneva, Switzerland for four years, during which time I had attended an international school consisting of over 96 significant person essay nationalities. I had already become fluent in French and had become accustomed to the new culture in which I was living--a culture which I had believed to be rich in tolerance and acceptance. Naturally, the women's remarks hurt. Was I really an "ugly American? Had I not been touched by the new world I had been exposed to?
Without question, my four years in Switzerland changed my life in countless ways. From the minute I stepped off the plane at Cointrin Airport, the vastly different sights along the clean street, the ubiquitous smells of rich delicious French cuisine, and my feelings of excitement about my new surroundings told me that I definitely was "not in Kansas anymore. Although it was sometimes difficult trying to find links between my self and my Saudi Arabian, Hungarian, French, Nigerian, or Chilean friends, I soon came to enjoy my new stir fry environment. By the time I left, significant person essay, I was wondering how I ever could survive the boredom of attending a homogeneous institution. This is not to say that, prior to this, I had been closed up in a bland box of a world. I had traveled to India, my father's home, and England, my mother's home, annually: a practice my family and I continue to this day.
I had been brought up without specific religious beliefs, but an awareness of my parents' spiritual backgrounds of Judaism and Hinduism. Thus my exposure to these various different nationalities in Switzerland built on my found-ations of cultural awareness, rather than laying the cornerstone for it. My understanding of my new environment was aided tremendously by my ability to speak French, and was subsequently one of the best gifts I brought back from my four year stay in Switzerland. An entire year of school lessons could not have taught me as much of significant person essay language as I learned form speaking with my Swiss friends, shopping in the local stores, or apologizing to my neighbors for hitting my ball into their yard.
My proficiency in French earned me a regular spot on a nationally broadcast Swiss radio significant person essay, in which a Russian child and I discussed tensions between major world powers. This was a rare opportunity, as, although Stephen and I were peers, significant person essay, the fact that Russian children attended the Soviet Embassy school meant that we were not classmates. Though, even if we had been allowed to speak casually before, I am not certain that our conversation would have reached the depth of discussion we achieved on the show. America will never again seem the same to me.
Geneva gave me enough distance to look at my country through objective eyes. Traveling throughout Europe was like a trip with Gulliver: it gave me the ability to look inside myself and discern my country's faults as well as its numerous strengths. Like the Swiss women's remarks, it hurt me to find that the United States is not the only country in the world with a rich and stimulating environment. With my new perspective, I saw that America was not what it had been. Then I thought significant person essay a moment and realized that America had not changed, but I had. One officer called this, significant person essay, "A good example of a foreign culture essay that works. This is because in most of her classes, significant person essay, she will be required to support any opinions.
The vocabulary is sophisticated without seeming labored, significant person essay. I do not suspect that the author had a thesaurus at hand! This essay is very well written. The essay demonstrates a transformation of the student from just an American in a foreign land to someone who embraces the international experience and grew with it. What I like about this essay is that it shows that the traditional categories of "extracurricular activities" need not be the only way to demonstrate that one has something of interest to bring to the college experience. I think this writer would be a fascinating person to get to know, because she would be able to contribute a fresh perspective to conversations about many of the important ideas that we wrestle with in college, significant person essay.
She might well be someone who would be especially adept at bringing together diverse members of the student body because she would not feel intimidated by differences, but would, instead, seek them out and value them highly, significant person essay. Reluctantly smearing sunblock over every exposed inch of my fifty-three pound body, I prepared mentally for the arduous task that lay ahead of me. After several miserable fishing ventures which had left my skin red and my hook bare, I felt certain that, at last, my day had arrived. I stood ready to clear the first hurdle of manhood, triumph over fish. At the age of seven, I was confident that my rugged, strapping body could conquer any obstacle.
Pity the fish that would become the woeful object of the first demonstration of my male prowess. Significant person essay me deeply was my naive eagerness to traverse the chasm dividing boy from man. In fact, so significant person essay absorbed was I in my thoughts that the lengthy journey to our favorite fishing spot seemed fleeting. The sudden break in the droning significant person essay the engine snapped me to reality. Abruptly jarred back into the world, I fumbled for my fishing pole. Dangling the humble rods end over the edge of the boat, I released the bail on the reel and plunked the cheap plastic lure into the water.
Once I had let out enough line and set the rod in a holder, I sat back to wait for an attack on the lure. The low hum of the motor at trolling speed only added to my anxiety, like the instrumental accompaniment to a horror film. And then it hit. A sharp tug on the line pulled me to my feet faster than an electric shock. I bounded to the pole, and when I reached it, I yanked it out of the holder with all of my might. My nervous energy was so potent that when I tugged on the rod, I nearly plunged headlong significant person essay the side of the boat and into the fishs domain. Although adrenaline streamed through my veins, after five minutes both my unvanquishable strength and my superhuman will were waning steadily.
Just when I significant person essay fully prepared to surrender to the fish and, significant person essay, with that gesture, succumb to a life of discontentment, pain, and sorrow, the fish performed a miraculous feat. Shocked and instantly revived, I watched as the mahi-mahi leapt from the oceans surface.
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We believe that he is sincere about his choices because his reasons are personal being from a small town, and so forth. He managed to tell us a good deal about himself, his values, and his goals while maintaining a strong focus throughout. I am learning, both through observations and first-hand experiences, that there are many mishaps in life which seem to be unexplainable and unfair, and yet have devastating consequences. Disease fits into this category. Its atrocity does not stem from the fact that it is a rare or uncommon occurrence, since illness and disease pervade our lives as we hear numerous stories of sick people and come into contact with them each day.
However, there is a marked difference between reading in the newspaper that a famous rock star or sports icon has tested H. positive and discovering that your own mother has been diagnosed with cancer. Undoubtedly, the most influential people in my life have been my mother and father. It is to them that I credit many of my accomplishments and successes--both inside and outside of school. Throughout my childhood, my parents have always fostered and encouraged me in all my endeavors. At all my sporting events, spelling bees, concerts, and countless other activities, they have always been front row and center. My parents, in conjunction with twelve years of Catholic training, have also instilled in me a sound belief in a loving, caring God, which I have come to firmly believe.
It therefore should not come as a surprise that the news of my mothers sickness would greatly alter my entire outlook on life. Where was my God? My mother, in fact, had been aware of her condition in the spring of my junior year in high school. She deliberately did not inform my sister or me of her illness because she did not want to distract us from our studies. Instead, my mother waited for the completion of her radiation therapy treatments. At this time, she brought me into her room, sat me down on the same wooden rocking chair from which she used to read me bedtime stories, and began to relate her story. I did not weep, I did not flinch. In fact, I hardly even moved, but from that point onward, I vowed that I would do anything and everything to please my mother and make her proud of me.
Every subsequent award won and every honor bestowed upon me has been inspired by the recollection of my mother's plight. I look to her as a driving force of motivation. In her I see the firm, enduring qualities of courage, strength, hope, and especially love. Whenever I feel discouraged or dispirited, I remember the example set by my mother and soon become reinvigorated. Instead of groveling in my sorrow, I think of all the pain and suffering that my mother had to endure and am revived with new energy after realizing the triviality of my own predicament. For instance, last year, when I was playing in a championship soccer game, my leg became entangled with a forwards leg on the other team, and I wound up tearing my medial cruciate ligament.
I was very upset for having injured myself in such a seemingly inane manner. Completely absorbed in my own anguish, I would not talk to anyone and instead lamented on the sidelines. But then I remembered something that my mother used to say to me whenever something like this happened: If this is the worst thing that ever happens to you, I'll be very happy, and you'll be very lucky. Instantly, many thoughts race through my mind. I pictured my mother as a young thirteen-year-old walking to the hospital every day after school to visit her sick father. She had always told me how extremely painful it had been to watch his body become emaciated as the cancer advanced day by day and finally took its toll.
I then pictured my mother in the hospital, thirty years later, undergoing all the physically and mentally debilitating tests, and having to worry about her husband and her children at the same time. I suddenly felt incredibly ashamed at how immature I had been acting over my own affliction. I gathered my thoughts and instead of sulking or complaining, helped coach my team to victory. I am very happy to say that my mother is now feeling much better and her periodic checkups and C. scans have indicated that she is doing very well. Nevertheless, her strength and courage will remain a constant source of inspiration to me.
I feel confident to greet the future with a resolute sense of hope and optimism. The majority of the suggestions for this essay highlight the danger inherent in relying on an overly poignant topic, in this case the writer's mother's bout with cancer. Part of why the reactions to this piece are so passionate and why there are so many of them is because had the applicant just taken a slightly different approach, he could have had a powerful and touching composition on his hands. It is always frustrating when a piece with so much potential misses the mark. In this case, the material and emotion are all there.
Had he spent more time and written with more sincerity, this essay might have been a real winner. I wish this kid had started the essay with his mom sitting him down in the rocking chair. That would have been a powerful beginning. In general, using the introduction of the essay to paint a scene or mood can be very effective. He should begin with the most simple and striking sentence possible, such as "On January 5, , my mother learned that she had cancer. Let the most dramatic point go where it belongs, at the end of the sentence--also known as the stress point. Because this topic is so personal, I yearn to know more about the student's reaction to his mom's cancer, how he and his family dealt with it over time. As written, things just seem a bit too tidy.
The author describes a valuable life lesson, but I find the writing style to be artificial and a bit maudlin. I imagine he resorted to the thesaurus more than once. The writer tells us a sad story about his mother with cancer and how he has strived to do his best because of what his mother has been through. The topic can be a tear jerker, but this essay lacked the depth and richness that other essays with similar topics possess. The experience obviously impacted the student very much. But what students do not realize is that they do not have to share such personal issues within the confines of a college essay. I don't believe the "epiphany" in the conclusion as it's described.
It's too easy and convenient to be believable. He begins his description with "For instance," which negates almost everything that follows. When he sees his mother in his mind, he "instantly" thinks this and "suddenly" does that, and finally "helped coach his team to victory. This essay smells of contrivance. Yes, his mother's bout with cancer affected him. Just not in the way he wants me to believe. This is the "lasting sanctifying effect" essay. Look at what the writer is actually saying using his own words : I used to be "absorbed in my own anguish" and "lament" my bouts with adversity. But, "instantly" or "suddenly" take your pick , I became a young man "confident to greet the future with a resolute sense of hope and optimism.
My mother got cancer. I'm now a thoughtful, mature adult. Return to: Lesson One: College Essay Questions. Updated February 11, Infoplease Staff. Please select from the following sample application essays: Essay 1: Wellesley Essay 2: Harvard Essay 3: Harvard Note: The following essays were not edited by EssayEdge Editors. Sample Essay 1 Wellesley, Influence of mother It took me eighteen years to realize what an extraordinary influence my mother has been on my life. Comments: The topic of this essay is the writer's mother. He pushed on with his education, and his current success in his career shows the importance of positive thinking. One more thing I respect my stepfather for is his will to work hard. After graduating high school at the top of his class, he entered the Marine Corps, where he served in The Korean War as a fighter pilot.
After his tour was over, he came back, a bit shaken up, but unharmed and with his GI bill, he enrolled into USC and in four years graduated at the top of his class once again, with the honors summa cum laude. My stepfather faced with great financial pressure over the years. He had to take care of his family members on his own. This man was the one person that kept our family running. Being first an underpaid firefighter, which is a feat itself own due to the fact he had to pass not only a difficult physical test but also a mental exam before he was considered to be a firefighter.
His next promotion was to moderately-paid engineer, and to get there he had to pass a written as well as a physical test. Moreover, to qualify for the promotion, he had to have three units of the IFSTA training program; these are units 3 Hose Practice; 5 Fire Streams; and 6 Fire Apparatus. Finally, he was promoted to a well-paid Captain of the Glendale Fire Department, and to get to the position of captain he had to complete the IFSTA training program having a minimum of two years in grade as a Fire Lieutenant measured as of one year beyond the date of the written examination and pass officer training school. Also, on the side, he was a private pilot so that he could earn extra money. He worked hard to ensure we could attend the best schools and got a decent meal.
Apart from these things that I learn from his life, he also advises me on the importance of hard work. With time, I have adapted to his way of thinking and turned into a hardworking person. Finally, my stepfather is one of the kindest people I know. For instance, he has three children with his first wife, yet he treated me like his own daughter so that I never felt left out. He always granted equal opportunities to each child. I remember the time he rewarded me with a very beautiful pin after I graduated high school.
This is not common with most stepfathers. However, he truly cares for and appreciates me as his stepdaughter, as if I were his flesh and blood. And he treats everyone with equal kindness. I admire my stepfather the most because he is the model that has molded my life by showing me the three most important things in life, which are optimism hard work and kindness. My stepfather is a true inspiration in my life. He has shown me that having the right attitude and values can influence the people around you. However, I can only try and aspire to be like him. The time I spend with him is never enough. I try to interact with him whenever every I get the chance. This is because I always learn something new, every time I am around him. Undoubtedly, he is a role model for everyone.
Remember: This is just a sample from a fellow student. Starting from 3 hours delivery. Sorry, copying is not allowed on our website. We will occasionally send you account related emails. This essay is not unique. Sorry, we could not paraphrase this essay. Our professional writers can rewrite it and get you a unique paper. Want us to write one just for you? We use cookies to personalyze your web-site experience. This essay has been submitted by a student. This is not an example of the work written by professional essay writers. The Most Influential Person in My Life Subject: Life Category: Hero Topic: Influential Person Pages 2 Words: Published: 14 September Downloads: Download Print. Get help with writing. Pssst… we can write an original essay just for you.
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